I celebrated the new year tonight with my father, his girlfriend, her son, and several of their friends. It’s wonderful to have a really nice meal once in a while. Challah, gefilte fish, chicken liver, horseradish, matzah ball soup, turkey, brisket, kugel, broccoli, dessert. If every day were a holiday, I’d be set.
But you’re using your computer on the high holidays! You’re going straight to hell! Oh, wait….we don’t have hell. So…what is the penalty for a Jew who doesn’t do what he’s supposed to?
Who says Jews can’t use computers on the high holy days? You’re thinking of shabbat… The penalty for disobeying the laws of the Sabbath is to be put to death, according to Exodus.
Whoa, really? Death? Damn….Jews are pretty hardcore. I mean, Christians…they just get vague threats that can’t be backed up. But Jews? That’s OG…